He's just not that into you.
Bare with me on this one...
With recent media coverage on police brutality against blacks in America and Trump winning the election has only fuelled the racial debate further. I'm not going to preach about racial harmony or write a post as an attempt to end racism because no matter where you go it will always be around. Instead I'd rather promote equality and acceptance of those around us.
If we were to go into space and you looked down on Earth you wouldn't see any borders or segregation. You'd just see giant masses of land where we, the human race live. Claiming different parts of the earth was something that we did. Racism isn't a natural occurrence, We have fallen victims to our own standard and way of life. I don't want to walk down the street and judge that person for the colour of their skin or the clothes they're wearing. And although a lot of us would like to think we don't judge people... we do. Whether you like it or not, because it's the environment we've grown up in and has now become part of our human nature.
Now for me, the way I see it is I rarely see myself has black. I mean of course I know I'm black but I don't walk round thinking about the perceptions others have of me because I'm black. Does that make sense? How limiting would that be if I was wary of speaking to old white ladies because they thought I was some thug. Of course the way not only blacks but every race are portrayed in the media only fuels the fire. Especially where I'm from blacks don't get a good wrap and we're all criminals apparently. If I was old and white I'd probably think the same thing to be honest. That's what you get when you walk down the street with your trousers half way down your legs and wearing hoods when it's 30 degrees outside. We all don't fit the mould, but with that perception already ingrained in our brains that isn't going to change anytime soon. So no longer are we trying to be who we are but we spend a lot of our time proving to people that we are not who society says we are. Maybe they just forgot to wear a belt today or the barber effed up their hair. What we look like doesn't make or define who we are. Our opinions, intelligence and creativity does that.
Interracial relationships are also a point of discussion. We've all looked at a couple, maybe a black man with a white woman or an asian boy with a hispanic girl, I don't know there are plenty of combinations. But for some reason don't we always assume that we are going to date someone of the same race as us. I'm going to be straight up if my white friend introduced me to his girlfriend and she was black I'd be a bit surprised. Not because there's anything wrong with it but again, the "perfect family" has been built up of white man with white woman or black guy with black woman. Why would we try and marry outside our own race come on that's absurd. Who wants mixed race babies anyway. It always puzzles me when people say "I don't date *insert race and sex here*". Come on really. Of course I understand that people may not be able because of religious beliefs or just strict parents but can we really limit ourselves this much. You're making yourself unavailable to like a good chunk of the worlds population just by practising that belief. If you get on, have common interests and enjoy spending time with them why should the colour of their skin even matter. I get too that we all have preferences but to just outright say you don't go for "those kind of people" is just a bit... odd.
Now I don't know too much about this but I am sure it happens, skin bleaching. Often used by celebrities to get a lighter complexion. Which is further emphasised by this whole "lightie" culture. What even is that and what does it mean. Congratulations on having slightly less melanin than others and slightly more than the rest. Just because you're a lightie doesn't mean you can ignore my messages or leave me on "seen" for months on end. The skin in which you are born in doesn't give you that privilege. How can you rate yourself above others because of a physical characteristic none of us get to decide. It's moronic. But back to skin bleaching and lightening, if you want to do it then do it, but let's not try to promote it as something that is necessary or something people aspire to partake in. Skin is a beautiful thing and something that we should all cherish, no matter the tone, scars or winkles.
I don't know about you but I am tired of being seen as that white guy's "Black friend". If we say "oh do you know Mark" and the other person is like "ah I can't remember can you jog my memory?" If you say "the black one" 9 times out of ten the other person will be like "damn yeah I remember thank God you classed him by his skin tone". It works for every race except white. Now I am not getting ahead of myself I understand that in the UK the dominant race is white and Mark is in fact black but I am just making a point that his skin colour shouldn't be that 1 thing that defines him.
I will never say I am proud to be black because quite frankly I don't know what that means. I am aware that black people have achieved great things in the past which in turn has done a lot for black people. Bit if this race thing didn't exist in the first place then they wouldn't have had to go through the struggle that they did. The fact that they were black just amplified the kind of person they were. Instead I am proud that I am educated at masters level. That was down to hard work and perseverance. I am proud that I have made a positive impact on people's lives because of the person I am on the inside. And I am proud that I get to write this blog and that you guys read it because for all you know I could be a robot.
I just want to say that I am thankful for everyone in this photo which goes without saying. #family
We all know 2016 was a pretty shoddy year but going into 2017 I don't want the previous year to leave a bad taste in my mouth every time I think about it. So when I think about what made 2016 good for me I always think about the people. This is something I've never done before but for my own peace of mind and just to give a few positive words about some incredible people I will publicly name who made this year great for me and why. If you don't like it... tough.
Aaron - Never a dull day when you're around. Seriously my 4 years at university wouldn't have been the same without you. Created too many memories and hope there's many more to come. Well there will be when we get our place in Amersham
Alice - You're my absolute favourite person. A part of me still thinks you're out of control but at least we have an understanding. I'm going to miss our bar shifts together but will never forget them. Thank you for being a considerate, honest and decent human being.
Danielle - I can never have a normal conversation with you which I love. I never know what I'm going to get with you and I'm very grateful that you have this rare quality. I think this past year has been a crazy one for us but when I look back on it I just think about the amount of laughs you've given me. P.S Thank you for almost taking me to a psychic.
Derren/Darren (whatever your name is) - You made long shooting days a pleasurable experience and I don't think I have ever laughed so much when you're around. You probably won't appreciate this because you're a cynical bastard but thank you for being part of my Masters journey.
Efrosini - The actual ying to my yang. I don't think I need to tell you what I think of you as I told you enough over the course of the summer. I just hope we get to work together again this year. A big part of my 2015, 2016 and hopefully my 2017.
Elaine - I don't think you're going to see this so I don't quite know why you're here. I'm going to appreciate you anyway as although you ghosted for most of the year I am still glad we've been friends after all this time. I learnt a lot about you this year and hope to keep on getting to know you in 2017.
Emma - You're still annoying but when I don't speak to you for at least a day it feels like my life is incomplete. You fill a gap that no one but you seems to fill and I don't think I will ever get bored interacting with you. I'm glad you've finally accepted my sense of humour and know that I don't actually hate you.
Georgie - 2016 was the year I learnt you and Alice are actually two separate people. You will forever be one of my true TOFS friends and your quirky personality never fails to make me laugh. One of very few people I actually miss from uni days. Just don't be a stranger!
Hayden - For an absolute mug I guess you're not too bad. You came through for me a lot last year. Thanks for the posters you made and for letting me crash at yours on numerous occasions. I actually got used to sleeping on your floor and was quite upset when left. I have no doubt that you'll be part of my 2017.
Jack - True don ever since 2010. I mean I don't really need to say anything mate. Although you can be a snake I wouldn't have it any other way.
Jane - My partner in crime. 2016 has definitely been mine and yours year. Out of everyone I know I think I spent the most time with you. Thank you for helping me with 2 projects and being up for going out whenever I wanted to. I don't really say it but you a true friend and I will miss you dearly when you go back home.
Jessica C - Probably my most unlikely friend. Only because you were a bit of a bitch to me whenever I tried speaking to you. But no one can resist my charm for that long.It's been great seeing you come out of your shell and giving me too many jokes at work. Forever my Chesil House buddy personal clown.
Joanna - The first quarter of my 2016 was definitely made by you. I don't think I've ever grown so close to someone so fast. Thank you for all those memories.
Katie - My American counter part. I am still amazed at how often you came to see me at camp. Oh wait.... haha sorry couldn't not joke about it. But seriously you are one reason why I go back to the states every year and I am not actually sure where our friendship came from but I am glad it exists. We share a special kind of banter and I will never get tired of hearing about all your boy related issues and I am always glad to tell you about my drama. You are my therapist, psychologist and sidekick.
Louise - My little gem. You and I both share a passion for the same field which is why we hit it off so perfectly. One of the most genuine people I have ever met who is so easy to speak to. I honestly don't think I have ever clicked so well with someone so early on. Thanks for helping me with Pathological and writing a great script for my masters project. Here for ya whenever you need me, either professionally or personally.
Michael - Mr Worrall. Thank you for restoring my faith in Editors. It's people like you that give me reassurance that I entered the right industry. Not only a cheery chappy but hugely talented and always willing to give a hand. You are an absolute diamond and can't wait to see what magic you perform with Pathological.
Noel - Well well well. Gonna be living in close proximity to you for what will be the 5th year. Guess that says a lot about us. You just can't stay away from me. Thankful that you were around to experience our first year of uni together. Would literally be here all day if I were to list the memories. But to name a few, you dribbling in the Taxi, Multi battles and that dreaded term 2. Forever a back it guy and probably a friend for life if I can't shake you.
Raemuel - Perhaps my oldest friend which doesn't stop us having a very turbulent relationship. If you haven't blocked me then you will see this. 2016 marked the year where you actually invited me round your house and introduced me to your girlfriend. 2 occasions that I feel very privileged for and I don't know what your problem is but yeah sort it out innit. It's been too long for you to still be holding grudges against me.
Robyn - Such a precious soul. Seeing you for the first time in a couple of years was perhaps one of my most exciting days of 2016. I thought I'd be nervous after all that time but I was just so excited and words can't describe how thankful I was that you invited me. You are one person that I never want to hurt and always try to make happy because you have given me so much. Also important to note that you're the only person I've dedicated a whole blog post to which is saying a bloody lot.
Sarah - The most complicated person on the list without a doubt. Our relationship is based on... actually what is it based on? All I know is that you've always been there and no matter where I am or what I am going through I can always turn to you for some much needed advice or constant parring. If I was to make one of these lists for the past 5 years you probably would have been on every one. Also let's just make it clear that 2016 was the year I finally saw you after how long even though we claim to be best friends.
Shannon - Miss Millar, we were in a relationship for a week and I don't just give my heart to anyone. Our regular phone conversations always come at the right time and our similar sense of humour just means we are always on the same page. It's almost going to be 7 years since that fateful first encounter and who knows what 2017 holds for us.
Toby - My child. Toby... I honestly don't know what to say. Spending a whole month with you brought out something in me that I've never felt before. I was a dad, big brother, uncle, mentor and sensei rolled into one. You pushed me to my absolute limit and I can't imagine that summer without you. I hope you keep your innocence for the foreseeable and I'm sure we'll meet again in 2017.
This list is by no means definitive but I feel as though we're so wrapped up in social dramas that we never take that opportunity to tell those we care about how much we appreciate them. I can probably say that nothing I've said here isn't anything that I haven't told these people before but saying it out in the open is liberating for me and hopefully gives these people confidence going into the new year. I love you all and hope we can grow in 2017 what we planted in 2016.
I also want to say thank you to the couples who have not only showed me that I don't mind being a 3rd wheel but also accepted me as a 3rd wheel.
Robertaron (Roberta and Aaron)
Layden (Lana and Hayden)
Jassica (Jack and Jessica)
Thank you to each and everyone that has given me a single memory in 2016 and hope to make many more in this coming year.
Before I say anything, this episode almost hit me as hard as when Ned Stark got his head chopped off (oops spoiler).
For you Eastenders fans out there I'm sorry to say that it's time to say goodbye to perhaps one of the most iconic sister acts in soap history, Veronica and Roxanne Mitchell. Now whenever a beloved character is killed off on a television show there's always back lash. "I'm never watching this again", "Let's boycott "said" show", "How will I explain this to my children?" and so on. And even though I loved the sisters, more specifically Ronnie, I do believe that in terms of themes and story this was in fact a fitting end to two much loved characters.
Before I go into that though I just want to quickly talk about my thought process throughout the whole episode. Because I've studied television for the past 4 years of my life I find myself normally correctly predicting what will happen in a television show. I have come to learn that soaps are perhaps the most predictable, except for the whole Mick being Shirley's son, I did not see that coming. Anyway I watched the episode a day late so I knew something went down but I just wasn't sure what. No Eastenders wedding goes off without a hitch, unless it's Lee and Whitney's wedding which was just a bore fest. So I prepared myself for something dire to happen and as the episode progressed about 10/15 minutes in everything was a bit too happy. Have you guys noticed yet that when someone's life is going a bit too great they normally end up dead. Trust me it's a full proof theory. You didn't think that Jack, Ronnie and Roxy were going to ride off into the Ongar sunset did you?
Well anyway so my prediction was that Roxy was definitely a gonna. Her demise had been building up for weeks and seeing Ronnie deal with the death of someone she loved so much I think would've made for some great TV. Ronnie is perhaps the most tragic and complex character to ever grace the world of soaps, I mean she was abused by her dad, lost her baby, got put in jail, killed a scumbag, she just never gets a break. So seeing how she would have dealt with such a traumatic experience, I think, would've been a predictable choice but also an effective one. So while I watched the rest of the episode I was just thinking how the axe was going to drop. Drug overdose maybe?
HOWEVER I've got to admit I did do a complete 180 and for a moment I thought that maybe Ronnie would get her happy ending. How wrong I was. My Red Wedding moment was when Honey came and said Amy and Ricky wanted Jack to read them a story. Cue Cinderella voice-over. Everything was just a bit too bleak at that point and I knew Roxy's time was up. I thought she'd meet her end when they sat on the roof with a bottle of champagne. A small fall and splat! At this moment I still thought Roxy was a dead woman walking but when Ronnie slipped my mind was like "hang on" what if it's Ronnie who dies. Not only that but Ronnie dies and it's Roxy's fault. Jack had been warning Ronnie for weeks how Roxy brings them down and this would have been the ultimate price to pay.
But thankfully when we left the roof, although I knew there was impending doom, I was just wishing Ronnie could go and consummate her marriage and Roxy could go and deal with a reborn Max Branning. But no, they just had to go swimming. Then with all the shots of the clock. I mean they pretty much shoved it in your face towards the end, time was running out for what I thought would be 1 sister. So when Roxie entered the pool and didn't resurface I thought that was it! BUT OH NO! Eastenders does a Walking Dead on us and decides to kill off perhaps my favourite character on the damn show. However while Ronnie tried to save her sister I did have hope. I mean do you remember the time Ronnie died for a few seconds then came back to life?
I would have been fine with just Roxy dying. That would have still been a major shock and the ramifications would make for an interesting year on the square. As Ronnie desperately tried to save her sister I just kept thinking "surely not". But with anything I show to truly believe someone is dead I needed to see a body and Eastenders delivered in artistic fashion. The last image of Ronnie and Roxy's bodies floating in a watery abyss was both beautiful and heartbreaking. But it did leave me wondering, was her dress actually that heavy?
Looking back now though it makes perfect sense that Ronnie died trying to save her sister and if Ronnie was going to die this is the only way Eastenders could've done it. Let's start off by saying the sisters were done justice and were given full recognition of how important they have been to the soap in recent years. Their storyline came on a New Years episode which after Christmas is perhaps one of the most watched episodes. Not to mention the episode was directed in a way that Eastenders have never done before. I mean that party scene was almost of cinematic quality.
But more on the sisters, the basis of their relationship has always been Ronnie being willing to do anything to protect her sister. She's killed for her, so the next step had to be dying for her. Roxy had proven that she had given up on herself almost as if she was too far gone to be saved but even til the end there will always be one person willing to take the plunge (pardon the pun). The last image of Ronnie's veil around Roxy was so symbolic and the perfect way to end their story.
But let's not forget that the sisters did have one last rendezvous before they met a watery grave. The scenes between the sisters leading up to the death were a perfect homage to not only the characters but also the actresses, Sam Womack and Rita Simons, who give top notch performances in their final episode. And your heart sinks some more when you think back to their whole "end of an era" conversation.
I'm not saying I agree with killing the sisters off, but I will say that if they were going to go it was always going to be under these circumstances and we should all appreciate what Eastenders accomplished with that episode. Let's not forget that Eastenders have had some awful storylines, getting it wrong on a number of occasions so let's give them praise for getting it right. I feel people are not actually angry at how they did but just the fact that 2 great characters will no longer be on our screens. If they wanted to kill someone off so bad, they should've just topped Lee, I mean we were all prepared for that.
But I mean this is Ronnie Mitchell, maybe she faked her own death and will come back in a few years...
