Frames are hard to break...

So my new years resolution was to get my sh*t together and basically have a better outlook on life and like most new years resolutions have I kept to it?... HAVE I 'ECK.

To be fair the year started off pretty well I felt I was in a good place mentally, professionally not quite physically (although this is something I want to work on) but all in all I guess I was pretty happy and just generally in a good mood about life. Now for anyone that knows me I'm rarely ever in a good mood, I mean I'm a pretty chill guy but I'm just never in a good mood. I just feel like people don't want to see other people happy especially if they're not happy themselves. But 2016 was different I was feeling good about life and the potential opportunities the year had to offer. However it's now 19th January 2016 and my good mood has just run out. I think it was on a meter and I've just forgotten to put more money in OR the meter itself has just been stolen.

Not to make this a depressing post, as that's where it seems like its going, but it's easier to go from a good frame of mind to a bad one than it is to go from a bad frame of mind to a good one. Think of it like a mountain. Its much easier to go from the top to the bottom than it is to go from the bottom to the top, because you know... gravity. Our frames of mind are the same so it's vital that we try and stay in not only the right frame of mind but a good one to stop ourselves falling from grace. But it's all well and good saying this, the real question is how do you do it.

I think a big part of it is just surrounding yourself with the right people which has been a big problem for me recently. I mean the people around constantly change, thoughts and opinions of them change and nothing is constant which gives you even more problems. There are people out there who will naturally support you but others who just screw you over which could be intentional or unintentional. I think this is actually a theme of most of my blog posts, the importance of friends. There are numerous people out there that can just lift me with one single sentence and these are the people we need in our lives. But also its important that we be this person for someone else. If you see someone is in need of support why not just give it to them. And support doesn't have to be a financial thing or donating a kidney it can be as simple as "well done" or "congratulations" or a simple compliment. I know for me personally this gives me an extra emotional boost which does wonders for my mental state.

i think I'm moving into a stage of my life where a lot of what I do is becoming public. Whether it be blog posts, vlogs, films or scripts. These are all creative properties of mine and just knowing someone enjoys or appreciates what I have created is great! And I can't thank the people enough who fall into this category. But along with this you get people who are just downers and for no particular reason are just there to spout their negativity. I don't understand why people waste their energy being negative towards other people who are just trying to do something with their lives. A lot of people call me a hater or say that I'm negative but what I've realised as although I do hate on a lot of things its never public. If someone asks me a question then I'll answer it truthfully. I'll never go out of my way to put someone down or sabotage something of theirs. Especially if its something creative because that's when people need all the positivity they can get.

I am a firm believer that people need to off load all their negative energy but do that privately. Write it down, tell a friend or speak into a mirror. Don't go out of your way to directly express your negativity at someone because ultimately it helps no one. It's a waste of your time and can potentially have a negative impact on the person who it's targeted at.

Hopefully all that made sense. The moral of the story is be positive and support others. Don't waste precious time and energy being a complete ass.
Playing one of my favourite ever games, Mario Kart 8. Video is a bit long sorry probably only for you avid gamers although the general chit chat and reactions may be of interest.
Enjoy!


Because some of you guys were so desperate to know.


Watch me break a world record... well, attempt at least.



I love me some TV, so I compiled a list of my favourite television characters.
WARNING: You will almost certainly disagree.


I don't get many opportunities to say it so I'll do it now...

So I have been blogging for a while now, think I started in February 2014 and to be perfectly honesty with you I thought I would've given up on it long ago. But what really keeps me going is when people tell me that they've enjoyed what I've written and that just makes my life, seriously. So I just wanted to say... thank you.

I mainly blog because I have something I want to get off my chest and writing is just the best way to do that. The fact that people are actually reading what I write and enjoying it is just a bonus. I often put up a mask in all my blog post but underneath it all is a shy 21 year old just trying to spill his heart out. Cheesy I know, but it's true.

I recently read back through a lot of my posts and I was actually pleasantly surprised about some of the stuff I've written and not so much about other pieces. It also amazes how much my views have changed on some subjects all in the space of just under 2 years. I am not the same person I was back then and I think blogging has been a catalyst for that.

I always try and write a blog about something I want to write about, I never try and force it. Which was actually a problem I had back in the day where I was attempting to churn out a post a day. As with anything in life you have to do it because you enjoy it it shouldn't be a chore which is actually part of the reason why I've started vlogging.

I love making videos and editing which is why I started vlogging. I don't have any intention of become internet famous although it would be nice for more people to see the stuff I'm putting out there. But even if they don't it's not going to stop me, and I know loads of the videos I've made haven't actually been that good but hopefully that will improve in the near future.

You're probably wondering why I'm telling you all this, I don't actually know myself, I guess I just want to give you a bit more of me as it is often hidden in my posts. I swear I'm, not as judgemental and harsh as I might seem but that kind of stuff just makes for better reading. So hopefully I keep the blog going for years to come and thank you all for coming on this journey with me.

Love and peace x
I probably had the best time of my life doing A Level media, doesn't mean that anything we made was good though. So for one time only... I'm going to show you the "films" we produced and my reaction to them.

Part 1


Part 2



First vlog of 2016, let's start as we mean to go on by answering some... interesting questions.


Stop staring into my soul... please.

I'll be straight up with you, I'm only writing this because I'm attempting to write an essay but I'm not really in the writing mood. So this will hopefully get me going... or not. Probably not. But it's worth a shot.

Sorry about the unimaginative title, not that you care, but at least you know exactly what the post is about. Let's just hope I have enough to say about it. So when we talk to people, we tend to look them in the eye right? Well you do, but I do not. I know there are other people like me out there but I truly struggle to make eye contact. And I'm not quite sure why, so let me try and figure this beast out.

People say that we should make eye contact to show the other person we're listening to them. Because if they're talking and we're looking at some guy trying his luck with a female way out of his league, although it's hilarious, it could be considered as rude. But I actually find it easier to listen to people when I'm not looking at them. If I'm making eye contact with someone, I'm trying so hard to keep that eye contact that I just completely forget that they're talking to me. I literally just switch off. If you ever want to try some juju on me, now you know what to do.

But what amazes me is that everyone else just seems to be comfortable with it. Why am I always the odd one out? Even when I'm not making eye contact I can just feel the person I'm talking to staring at me and it's really unsettling. Obviously it's not their fault, they're just being normal, I just need to get my act together. What do I find so uncomfortable about it? I have no idea, I mean everyone does it, it's a normal thing so why can't I do it. I've tried that trick when you look in between their eyes or at their nose but then I just think they're going to ask "Why the f*ck are you looking at my nose?" and that's even more awkward.

And I try, I really do but I'll get to about 2 seconds of some really greatly executed eye contact but just have to stop looking. There's something about someone looking directly into your eyes that's a bit existential... if that makes sense. Like why do we even look at the eyes? Why not the mouth or the hair or the ears? To be fair I find it slightly easier making eye contact with people I know well but still even then I only last about 5 seconds, still an improvement.

When we look each other in the eyes what exactly are we looking at? Are we just looking at the eyes, into our souls or just our reflection in their pupil? These are some pretty deep questions about something so trivial and normal. You know how people say you can tell a lot about how someone is feeling just by their eyes. Really? The only thing I can tell is if you've had a late night, are drunk or are high. And that's it. But you know what bugs me about this whole thing, I notice when other people struggle to make eye contact and it bugs me. How hypocritical. So this is probably what everyone else thinks about me... *sigh*.

I think everyone should just get into the habit of closing their eyes when they talk.